For Creativity Challenge Day 32: prayer
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Love With A Capital L
Okay, I’ll admit it, I’m afraid of the darkness that swirls around me. That seemingly is overtaking the people of this country. Tearing it apart, creating divisions that corrupt decisions that are needed to correct our trajectory.
And what trajectory would that be?
I’m not sure. Wholeness? That which binds us together, because we seem to be ripping apart at the seams. Slinging derogatory remarks, name-calling, ugly words, acts of hatred, and ignorance.
And what is ignorance?
Unknowing? Chosen or otherwise? A lack of wanting to know something different from what is known. Only a partial image, rather than the whole picture.
And what would cause this lack of wanting to know?
Fear. Fear of Other. Fear of what is different, therefore unknown.
And the hatred?
Fear magnified. Multiplied, as one fear is piled upon another, and the need to strike out becomes the only action that might diminish the fear and all those feelings it brings. Might release them.
And does striking out release them?
Yes. On some levels, but only in the moment. It satisfies that need for action, but also does lots of harm and damage to others, as well as to self.
And have you ever acted on hatred?
Yes.
And do you still do so?
No. At least, I try not to.
And why do you try?
Because I learned something from those actions. As I said, the release was only temporary. Only in the moment. But, then it called for more, sort of like a promise. It was as though the hate could only feed on more hate, more hurtful actions. But, the momentary release was always only momentary. And the pain of watching myself become something I never wanted to be, lasted so much longer.
And what was it that you never wanted to be?
Someone who hurt others, found some sort of sick satisfaction in seeing the pain in their eyes, but then, was shocked to find it in my own.
And this pain taught you?
Yes. I learned about anger, how easily it can turn to hatred. Learned that it has no end, except destruction. Not just of Other, but of self.
And to what did you turn instead?
To Love, with a capital L.
And what is Love with a capital L?
Well, there is love, the ordinary everyday feelings of fondness we have for family and friends, and our spouses. Sometimes for the world itself and all the wonders it holds. Love with a capital L, is The All. The Universe and all of its differences, all of its shades from darkness to light.
And now, we have returned to that darkness you mentioned at the beginning.
Yes. Because Love with a capital L is so much harder to do than anger and hate, which only feeds on the darkness of unknowing.
And why is this Love with a capital L, so much more difficult?
Because hatred is only a diffused sort of light, blurred and fuzzy at best. It defines only what is seen, and seeks only to destroy it. While Love, with a capital L, is a glaring, but warm spotlight. It begins within, first defining one soul, and then works outward to define the soul of All.
And why does it begin with only one soul?
Because Love, with a capital L, is faith. And faith is the belief in that which
is unseen. It begins in the rich dark soil of a soul, but must be nurtured by
further acts of faith.
And what are these further acts of faith?
There are many, but it might begin with understanding, forgiveness, and acceptance.
And those things will bring light into the darkness?
Yes. Because understanding will bring knowledge to the unknown. Forgiveness will bring a letting go of anger and hatred. And acceptance will allow the Other to be brought closer into that Love with a capital L.
And are you still afraid?
Yes, a bit, but far more at peace. Thank You.
And why the thank you? (said with a smile I could hear)
(With a responding smile) Because you have helped me to remember who I really am.
Elizabeth Crawford 12/22/2016
Notes: Today’s word prompt was prayer. I started off to write a short piece, but ended up with this. For me, prayer has ever been getting quiet and centered and then, entering into conversation. I know prayer is different for every individual. With Christmas just around the corner, I would hope that everyone would take a moment to pray for our world and all who live upon it.
Soul's Music 
As I read, I realize that Love is what I wrote about today too. I just didnt use the word. I loved reading this, my friend. You show me how to really sit with oneself, ask the questions and find the answers. Not a small teaching. Thank you.
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There’s love with a L and then there is politics with a P and sadly hate with a H. We can only root for Love and hope it will Win.
Yes, we can hope love will sometimes
knock on the window with dust on its hem,
and we’ll be brave enough to let it in.
Elizabeth (with a few stolen words)
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Yup!!
Lol, and thanks. So glad you agree.
Elizabeth
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We have to remember that love ‘trumps’ hatred. And yes, we do need to take time to pray, each of us in our own way, for the world!
I love how love trumps hatred, and couldn’t agree more. Prayer is a flow of energy, expressed out into the Universe. One can’t know where it might go, or whom it might touch. It is that flutter of a butterfly’s wings that might cause a tsunami on the other side of the globe.
Elizabeth
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This is similar to my own trajectory, including the thank you. So thank YOU! We dialogue to think and write to think, with lots of being moved and other kinds of perception thrown into the mix. I have only one terribly sharp image of hate, the rest is blurry, amassed, and still it is a pile I have to climb through sometimes when it comes to those who hurt children.
Thank you, Susan. It is always so good to come here and know that I have been understood. My first study, before College, was in Scripture. And I soon learned the importance of looking up the words, tracing their epistemology in their original language. I learned that prayer is not a plea, or begging, but was originally meant to describe a conversation between equals, the result of an obligatory relationship based in the knowing of the others name. That understanding transferred into my writing, another form of conversation. And you are so correct, about the pile we sometimes have to climb up and through to get where we need to go. And by the way, I find that the older I get, the easier I cry when anyone is hurt.
Elizabeth
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A beautiful conversation/prayer! Thank you Elizabeth!
And thank you, Annell. I have to admit that I am always surprised when these inner conversations fall out onto the page. I believe that Poetry is whatever the poet chooses it to be. Thus, they most often end up here on my Poetry blog. They come from the deepest part of me, and I see them as another part of my Soul Songs.
Elizabeth
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This is a perfect poem to read today, Elizabeth. As I read I thought: there is only one person to fear right now and unfortunately he is in power. I think his tactics are backfiring, as the more he tries to create division, the more people come together. Witness yesterday at all the airports where people gathered to support those caught in his latest executive order. Bottom line, I think there are more of us with humanity in our hearts than hatred. Time for us to stand up and speak out, for sure. Loved this poem even more second time around.
Thank you, my friend. And I agree that there are more of us uniting, than fighting. We can all hope that continues. And I think that is why I posted it today. As you know, my physical disabilities won’t allow me to march, but that doesn’t stop me from marching on paper, lol. I plan on continuing to do that and even have a few ideas after reading the responses here. Love is a force in its own right (and rightness). Maybe we could begin by forgiving him for being foolish? We have all been there at some point.
Elizabeth
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And I agree! I loved part 9, but could not find the way to comment?
Hi Annell, that’s because it’s an old post and after a certain amount of time, the comments are shut off. If you go to where I posted the URL, you can comment there.
Elizabeth
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Sometimes the best conversations begin as yours did….with a confession of fear….an acknowledgement of vulnerability. It paves the way for humble, open authenticity and that is the pathway to the ability to truly HEAR.
I so agree, C.C. When I first admit that I am a human being (which means I am imperfect), people are far more ready to listen because they are human as well. But, the fear just keeps piling up, day after day, as we watch this seemingly inhumane man blithely sign away our freedoms. Love with a capital L, is the only way I know to push back the hatred he seems intent on creating. So the conversation must continue if we are to have any hope at all. I must continue to remind myself that he is only a man, another human being, as imperfect as I am.
Elizabeth
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If you know that it’s fear you can stop the hatred… and capital love would work, but it’s a process that starts with listening.
Again, I agree Bjorn. It does begin with listening. Listening to my own heart, forgiving the fear I find there. Then moving toward forgiveness toward others who have the same fears, and hopefully into a wider understanding. That wider understanding is the place I want and need to come from. And yes, it is all a part of the process that begins within me. It is always easiest to point a finger and blame someone, something else, and thereby sidestep the responsibility that points its finger right back at me. Thank you for reminding me of the essentials.
Elizabeth
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A great prayer carried in dialogue… allowing us to also see the play in our minds and in our hearts.
Thank you very much, ZQ. That wasn’t my intent when I wrote it. I was the one giving the prompts and picking the words. I was a bit surprised when the word “prayer” came into my head. I know that, for many, prayer is somewhat ritualistic in form. I almost decided against using the word for that reason. But, I couldn’t come up with another so decided to leave it. When I came here the next morning, I sort of fidgeted around for a bit, then decided to explore my own concept of prayer and how it works for me. That was what I intended to do, but found myself actually writing out the conversation going on in my head. I was perhaps, more surprised than anyone, that this was the result, crossed my fingers that maybe someone would understand, and hit the publish button. I’m glad I re-posted it today. I’m learning a lot through this current conversation.
Elizabeth
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A wonderful piece of writing, which I was enthralled to read. I discovered after many years of hating my stepmother that it was myself I was poisoning. (We had ceased all contact, so I wasn’t attacking her, but I kept the hate and unforgiveness alive within me.) Then I realised had to let it go and instead be grateful for what she had taught me, even despite herself. I would say, though, that there is one kind of hatred that serves us well – when instead of hating other people, we hate the behaviour or condition, e.g. we hate intolerance, we hate cruelty, and so on.
Hi Rosemary. I would have to agree with you. I thought my anger was my only defense against a certain individual, until I realized that that same individual had forced me to learn how to stand up for myself. It takes time to learn such lessons. I would also like to agree with you about hating the behavior, but that’s a difficult line to draw and have all too often seen it turn into hatred of the individual displaying the behavior. I think it might be better to decide which behaviors one would actively resist and then choose what that resistance would look like, and then start practicing it. For example: I decided that if I ever saw anyone harassing another individual for their ethnicity or religious beliefs, I would take out my cell phone and clearly state to that individual that they were committing a hate crime and if they didn’t stop immediately I would call the police, and then do so. That allows the individual to make a choice and puts the responsibility where it belongs.
Elizabeth
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I too have focused or tried to focus on forgiveness. I’m not ready yet but I agree with you that Love is the answer and we’re living the question. I do pray that we all unite, that we chose Love because that is what creates peace. Lovely write Elizabeth. It was soothing to what ails me and many right now.
Myrna, thank you. I have found that if I ask to be made willing to be willing to forgive, it helps a lot. It most often leads me to that reality that we are all imperfect human beings, and that if we ourselves want to be forgiven, we must forgive others. We are most often, far more alike than different. It helps to deliberately seek out those similarities, rather than the differences. I am also aware that those differences can be the very strengths we are in need of. Thanks again, for joining the conversation.
Elizabeth
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Wow, Elizabeth, that’s a gutsy thing to do, with the phone. And I love the wisdom of asking to be made willing to be willing to forgive. Thank you for sharing both these things.
Not sure how gutsy it is or isn’t. It came about because I saw a video on Facebook, shortly after the election. A group of shoppers standing in line at a Customer Service desk. At least ten or more individuals. And 1 large, elderly woman simply erupted and began to vilify the two woman in front of her because they were Spanish/perhaps Mexican. No one spoke up, the crowd just sort of milled around as the woman kept getting nastier and nastier. The store employees did nothing as well. The video was made by another customer with her cell phone. That didn’t discourage the elderly woman, instead it seemed to encourage her all the more. It was so very ugly as she tried to get others to join her or at least agree with her about how these two unknown women had no right to be there, because they were lazy #o! spending “our hard earned tax dollars.” I sat quietly after the video stopped and thought about what I would do if confronted by such ugliness. The words “hate crime” kept running through my head, so I went looking for a definition of that phrase. And yes, public haranguing or disparaging comments aimed at a stranger because of ethnicity or religious beliefs are considered hate crimes. Could I see myself using that information? Yes. Even doing it quietly and calmly. I even practiced it aloud, lol. And it satisfied the agitation I had felt throughout the video. I also realized that doing such a thing would make me the object of that hatred, but that would also allow me to punch in that emergency number. And might encourage others to follow suit. Although I deeply dislike what I am seeing here in my homeland, I’m convinced we can and should use it to learn new skills and to bolster our own belief systems. Always coming from our own truth with love and understanding to guide us. As far as the willing to be willing to forgive, I learned that long ago from a Catholic nun who played a rather large roll in teaching me about what love is truly all about.
Elizabeth
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A most heart stirring write! ❤️
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