When The Words Say Too Much

For the Sunday Whirl poetry prompt: Wordle #183

shine, crazy, diamond, martyr, seer, secret,
laughter, prisoner, childhood, steel, stranger, shadow


When The Words Say Too Much

She held the secret
close, prisoner of childhood

Sometimes erupted in crazy
laughter at mere thought
of revelation.

It was a diamond shining
it’s brilliance against
black velvet darkness.

Feared one day a stranger would come,
a seer, slicing her world apart
with the steel of truth,

and she would spew it all out,
because she’d always known she wasn’t
martyr material.

Notes: More often than not, the word list itself suggests a path to follow, or simply remains silent to my utter frustration. This list suggested so many things, starting with Joan of Arc and then rapidly moving on to many other things. It was difficult to curtail the many thoughts running through my mind, but finally got this on paper. But the words didn’t seem satisfied and kept suggesting more. So, you get two poems today and the words just keep on dancing.


Sometimes thought she might be crazy,
holding the secret deep in her heart,
its diamond brilliance eclipsing
even smallest of shadows.

No longer stranger to herself, prisoner
of harsh childhood caught in steel trap
of someone else’s nightmare, no more
a martyr to another’s articles of faith.

Finally free to stand in open sunshine,
feel the breeze against her skin,
and hear the utter joy in her own
bubbling laughter.

Elizabeth Crawford 10/19/14

About 1sojournal

Loves words and language. Dances on paper to her own inner music. Loves to share and keeps several blogs to facilitate that. They can be found here: https://1sojournal.wordpress.com/ https://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/ http://claudetteellinger.wordpress.com/
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15 Responses to When The Words Say Too Much

  1. oldegg says:

    Although I prefer the second because of its positive outcome both are driven by the subjects troubled minds which the words almost demanded that be the course we take.


  2. jae rose says:

    I think the first poem maybe written for someone else to read…just as we have been trained not to ‘spill’…and the second is for her..her journey and growth…both equally important to come out…both definitely show strength not martyrdom


  3. Misky says:

    I quite like the first one, Elizabeth.


  4. drpkp says:

    I love them both – and note that it seems the words took us to a similar place ….


  5. drpkp says:

    Must add that “she’d always known she wasn’t matyr material” is brilliant


  6. annell4 says:

    Yes, these words seemed to write themselves into a poem, you were so lucky, they wrote you into two! Loved them both.


  7. Two excellent poems, the second a happier subject, but the first gripped me entirely.


  8. The second contained more hope, but I could feel hope thread its way through the first piece, as well. Fear and hope go hand in hand. ❤


  9. I love the inwardly held and protected diamond shining against the darkness – that’s what gets us through, when we are young….love both of these, Elizabeth, but especially Wildflower. We are all wildflowers!


  10. C.C. says:

    Both are exquisitely written, but I’m partial to the first one because “steel of truth” is just too cleverly depicted not to stand in awe of it….and “she’d always known she wasn’t martyr material” is super brilliant.


  11. Pamela says:

    Yes, both excellent poems, Elizabeth. I happen to favour the second. It seems lighter in its message.

    Pamela ox


  12. Bastet says:

    Excellent .. your muse was in a whirl-wind of inspiration!


  13. Shawna says:

    “Feared one day a stranger would come … and she would spew it all out” … Ooh, that does sound scary.


  14. Cathy says:

    Love them both, with a little more leaning towards the first. More because it has a raw edge to it.


  15. Eerie! I like both, but being a dark side person, I naturally like the first one best.


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