For Sunday Whirl: Wordle #9
http://sundaywhirl.wordpress.com/
This week’s words are: stories, bone, etches, temple, tangled, stardust, light, serpents, sparks, sky, threads, gossamer, slit.
Wordle Etheree
Light
sparks sky,
gossamer
clouds tangled like
serpents in stardust
above temple ruins gone
the color of dried bones.
Seem to whisper stories from
just beyond thin slit of door left
carelessly ajar, as night etches its
threads of darkening shadowed existence.
Elizabeth Crawford 6/19/11
Process Notes: Earlier last evening, had written a poem about standing between sunset and moonrise. When I first saw the wordle words, that poem was immediately echoing through my thoughts and wouldn’t let go. So decided to distract myself by doing an etheree with the words from the wordle. There’s still a bit of an echo, but not near as loud as it was. An Etheree is ten lines in syllabic form, adding one syllable per line. If you’d like to check out the other poem, it is posted at http://claudetteellinger.wordpress.com and even has photos to go with it.
We were of like mind this week, those words wrapped our pieces together with common threads. I love that you created an etheree. The form stumped me and wouldn’t come. This is inspiring me to try again.
The Etheree is an unfolding both in process and product. It might appear simple and smooth, but it isn’t. It takes a bit of time and definite concentration, however, each time I do one, I love what happens and how it seemingly slides down the page with ease. They are well worth the effort it takes. Thanks Brenda and I did hear the echoes and find that like mind,
Elizabeth
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I am liking the etheree more an more as a form. I love the structural unfolding. Love the line “the color of dried bones” which resonates for reasons I have not figured out. I like the sound and image and the line stands out from the rest.
Heading over to see the other…
margo
Thank you Margo, I do like the etheree, but also find that it takes a bit of work and concentration (a huge vocabulary certainly doesn’t harm either). And I like it for the very same reason, that sense and feel of unfolding that results from the form itself. Glad you enjoyed the poem,
Elizabeth
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What a terrific idea. I think I shall try that with next weeks wordle. I love “serpents in stardust”.
dk
Donna, both the wordle and the form alter thought patterns and process. I am always a bit surprised at where they take me. Thanks so much for visiting and commenting,
Elizabeth
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“tangled like serpents in stardust” – wow! And “temple ruins gone the color of old bones”. Fantastic writing, Elizabeth!
Thank you Sherry and to quote someone we both know, “It’s whatever you want it to be.” lol,
Elizabeth
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“clouds tangled like
serpents in stardust”
That is just beautiful, Elizabeth. What a lovely etheree. I am really enjoying this form, more and more.
Pamela
Pamela, I like it especially when responding to an image/picture/photo. Maybe because I can choose a detail and then move out from it into a wider space. That unfolding thing, again. Thanks for your generous words, and I loved your bird woman.
Elizabeth
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Yes, it seemed to write itself. I loved each word!
Ahh but there was a real struggle after the sixth line. However, when I read it through after finishing it, I felt the same way. It certainly did seem to write itself. Thanks Annell,
Elizabeth
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This is a beautiful piece, Elizabeth, and I admire your dedication to the many different forms of writing poems. I had difficulty with all that when I was young as I could not find the freedom in it but you seem to be at ease and it works for you, hence my prose works for me. Nicely done!
Renee, would you be surprised to know that I felt the same way at one time? I didn’t want to be held inside someone else’s arbitrary rules. And although I have established some comfort with syllabic forms, I still won’t do the classical forms that use iambic pentameter. Probably never will. Thanks for sharing your thoughts,
Elizabeth
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Seem to whisper stories from
just beyond thin slit of door left
carelessly ajar, as night etches its
threads of darkening shadowed existence.
…that is really beautiful Elizabeth! I also like the form you used.
I managed better this week with my wordling whirl, as I realises I don’t HAVE to use ALL the words. I left two out this time. 🙂
Thank you so much Susannah. I am getting more and more comfortable with the wordles (really didn’t like them at first). Forms are not my usual forte, I have a tendency to forget they exist and can really create something different and unusual. I liked this poem once it was finished. It seems to unfold right in front of the reader. It’s a bit of work, but well worth the doing,
Elizabeth
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Wonderful use of wordle words, Elizabath. And you inspire me to try an etheree.
I especially liked: Clouds tangled like serpents in stardust. Fascinating imagery!
Mary, I think we have both found something in these wordles that neither one of us expected. What a blessing, yes? Thanks so much for your comments. The serpents in stardust surprised me but also immediately brought an image. I like the Etheree, even though it takes a bit of effort, I am always pleased at the outcome.
Elizabeth
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That was one powerful echo, but after seeing the photos, I understand.
Mike, I was tempted to include a few with the poem. Then realized that the other post was simply a warm-up for this one. Liked the imagery here, so decided to let it stand alone. Glad I did, and thanks for your kind and generous words,
Elizabeth
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I love the mysterious view! Your words impact wisdom from beyond…
I loved it~
Ella, although modern in form and words, this poem still seems to carry an essence of mythos about it. I agree, it is a somewhat myserious view. Thanks for stopping and commenting,
Elizabeth
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Wonderful idea, beautiful execution.
Thanks very much Viv. Coming from you that means a lot!
Elizabeth
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My fav so far. A BIG fn of repetition and GREAT, skilled writing. Impressive.
http://henryclemmonspoet.blogspot.com/2011/06/proofs-of-life.html
Glad you are impressed Henry, I certainly liked your incantation,
Elizabeth
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Elizabeth, this is lovely, and the form suits it, the way that it builds, layering on new ideas and images. I love that idea of a place whispering stories from a “door left / carelessly ajar”. How something careless can inspire something crafted with such care.
Richard
Thank you Richard. I often feel that way about my quirky thought patterns. I will think or write down a word/phrase, then go back later and find an entire complex of thoughts attached to it, seemingly held there, carelessly waiting for me to find them.
Elizabeth
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