Other Voices

 

for Big Tent Poetry Prompt:  Haibun
For an explaination and examples of Haibun go to:
http://bigtentpoetry.org

Other Voices

Throw-away child is not born, but made, formed by words of others. “Why must you always exaggerate? Why can’t you be like the others? Your anger is inappropriate, therefore wrong. Why must you ask so many questions? Because that is just the way it is and there is no point in fighting it. You are bad for disagreeing with us. Why can’t you just accept it? Shut your mouth, we don’t want to hear your ridiculous views. You embarrass us and that hurts. You think too much. Blind faith is all you will ever need. Why can’t you at least try to get along?”

wind rustles through trees
loosening leaves that drift down
where spotted fawn sleeps

Throw-away child gives birth to restless spirit. Always moving, always seeking acceptance. Develops an outside reach, becomes outsider, even to herself. Tries to conform, but it breaks something deep inside of her. Begins to live on if-onlies: if only she looked more like them. If only she had black hair, not soft curly brown. Wasn’t so short, and didn’t hear what wasn’t spoken except in body language and tone. If only she didn’t see so differently. She begins to shut down from confusion found in mixed messages.

bear sleeps through winter
sweet dreams of rich dark honey
finally wakens

Middle-aged, she finally hears voice of the child within her. Seeks forgiveness for her ignorance and fear. Sits to watch as child dances through trees, to music she makes with her own movement. Introduces woman to her friends: furred, four-legged, and feathered. Teaches woman to hear other voices, to see in a slide glance, what others deem irrelevant. Gives laughter and love with ease of knowing. They walk together now, hand in hand, sing in couterpoint harmony, words with meanings they have discovered. Feed one another, grateful at last, to find that the world has lost, not one, but two throw-away children.

sunset silhouettes
dark against vibrant colors
two eagles soaring

Aged now, her arthritic body moves slowly. Has learned that alone is nothing to fear. Aloneness has come to mean warmth and soft-shared laughter, as she curls herself to rest, knowing the child breathes there, always at center of her being.

Elizabeth Crawford  9/24/10

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About 1sojournal

Loves words and language. Dances on paper to her own inner music. Loves to share and keeps several blogs to facilitate that. They can be found here: http://1sojournal.wordpress.com/ https://soulsmusic.wordpress.com/ http://claudetteellinger.wordpress.com/
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14 Responses to Other Voices

  1. Tumblewords says:

    I love this journey – the realness and appreciation of the inner and astute check of the outer. Wonderful read.

    thank you Tumblewords. It is a journey and I also feel good about having written it. The magic of poetry, whatever form it takes, always astounds me for some reason. I never tire of it and what it teaches and shows me,

    Elizabeth

    Like

  2. Mary says:

    Elizabeth, the ending is so poignant. I am glad you wrote this, and I am glad that the child is right there at the center of your being! Give her a hug from me~

    Mary I am glad I wrote it as well. The child’s name is Beth and she says thank you for the hug, she likes those, and sends one back to you. She knows you are safe, she reads right along with me. Thank you for all of your comments Mary, they have helped in so many ways,

    Elizabeth

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  3. Diane T says:

    Elizabeth, in this poem you have definitely done well with the haibun form. As I look at your haiku, the three of them could also almost stand alone as a poem. Just as the prose part of your haibun could stand alone. Maybe that is how haibun works. Anyway, yours is depthful, but I wouldn’t expect anything less.

    Diane, thank you for saying that but there are those days when I just throw up my hands and go play word games, lol. And I still feel a bit awkward with the form but find it interesting with its two distinctly different voices. I have tried something similar but this was still difficult for me. I have a tendency to put my head down and just bull my way through things on occasion. Half-way through this I looked up and realized I could stop pushing. Thank goodness,

    Elizabeth

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  4. James says:

    Marvelous. I really like the way the haiku and natural images juxtapose with the text.

    James, when I learned haiku (long, long ago), it was as a nature form with the active aspect as the last and turn line. I reverted back to that in this piece and really like the outcome. Thanks for stopping and commenting,

    Elizabeth

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  5. pamela says:

    Wonderful Elizabeth and the ending is spectacular.
    Pamela

    Thank you Pamela, I’ll put the spectacular in my kudo box, lol. This is one of those pieces that I will have to let sit for awhile and then go back and see what the hell happened while I was writing it. I’m still a bit stunned that I actually did it, and realizing only bits and pieces as the day wears into evening. It’s a damned good feeling though.

    Elizabeth

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  6. gospelwriter says:

    This is lovely, a lovely write – don’t know much about haibun but I think this pretty much fits the description. Ah, and dare I say yet again? – a familiar story… Well done!

    Ruth, I don’t think I know that much about the form either, yet. Between you and I, it’s always a familiar story, and that is always so comforting. Thank you for that and all of your words,

    Elizabeth

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  7. systematicweasel says:

    Wonderful write up! =)

    -Weasel

    Thank you Weasel, it’s been quite a journey taken without ever leaving home. Another great reality about poetry, yes?

    Elizabeth

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  8. wysfool says:

    I really like the haiku in this one. a strong second voice

    Thank you for that wysfool. I don’t do much haiku, sort of overdid it years ago, but I knew what they would be almost immediately. They were by far, the easiest part of this piece. And yes, I like that second voice, like a second opinion, a completely different perspective, almost a glimpsing commentary,

    Elizabeth

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  9. vivinfrance says:

    A wonderful, cathartic piece of writing, Elizabeth/Beth. It is good to keep the child in us alive, to be appreciated. I’m so glad you wrote this, and shared it with us.
    ViV

    Thank you Viv, and cathartic is absolutely correct, could even be underlined, lol. And as strange as this might sound, it may be the one safe place to share it.

    Elizabeth

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  10. derrick2 says:

    Yes, the haiku are lovely depictions of nature/life and the prose between is very much appreciated, Elizabeth.

    Thank you Derrick, it’s a bit more personal than most, but it was certainly where I needed to go and the words certainly intended to take me. And now that I can sit back and read, I like it and what it says.

    Elizabeth

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  11. Jeeves says:

    The journey said so well!!!Lovely

    Thank you Jeeves. Can’t say I particulaly liked the journey but sometimes the learning process isn’t likable, just necessary. And slow to come,

    Elizabeth

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  12. An old enough (thankfully) truely appreciate how you have given words to journey from conflicted childhood to cronehood and the wisdom gain, symbolized in the images of fawn, bear and soaring eagle. Lovely passage about passages. Thank-you.

    Thank you Happy Flower. It wasn’t my intent when I started but somehow it just kept moving. Poetry fascinates me because I never know where it will take me. Glad you stopped by,

    Elizabeth

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  13. sadlywaiting says:

    Perfect title, a great exploration of that idea in what follows. I like the chronological unfolding of the prose, juxtaposed with the progress of the haiku, with different animals in each. Wonderful, thanks for sharing.

    Like

  14. 1sojournal says:

    Sadlywaiting, thanks so much for your kind words. Not sure if I actually got the haibun correct, but it was certainly worth trying and will probably try it again. I am intrigued by the two very different voices and how they do support one another and deepen the whole poem.

    Elizabeth

    Like

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